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  • #76
    Originally posted by Mallard View Post

    Having babies after 35 dramatically increases the risk of downs syndrome.
    all complications. One of the doctors we saw said basically its not socially acceptable to have babies in our teens but its probably the best time biologically, once you get to be older when you can afford it for lack of better description your chances for complications goes up significantly.

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    • #77
      Originally posted by Bignorm View Post

      all complications. One of the doctors we saw said basically its not socially acceptable to have babies in our teens but its probably the best time biologically, once you get to be older when you can afford it for lack of better description your chances for complications goes up significantly.
      One of best friends at 17 got his girlfriend pregnant who was 16. Instead of asking for the clinic, he bought a ring and made it official. Ended up getting a job with SaskPower as a laborer, then became a skilled trades person and now is a six figure manager. He is not even forty and his kids are getting ready to leave the nest. He won't even be 50 and have 30 years in and could be pensioned off.

      Sadly the majority of us don't have the maturity to do something like that but I really wish there wasn't such a social stigma about it.

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      • #78
        Originally posted by Clambake View Post
        When I was a teenager one of my best friends was a First Nations guy. Nice guy and came from a great family. Both of us were kind of akward kids.

        We would be in the Cornwall centre and some of the tougher elements in the First Nations community would be " hey, what are hanging out with that white dork for etc etc". As we got older he found his way into the drugs and alcohol scene quite heavy and we parted ways. He also found his birth parents and considered them his real parents and thought of his real parents as the nice white couple that helped him out as a kid.

        As as me and my wife started to look into adoption and the quickest path into parenthood I just thought of this kid and we couldn't do it. I know each circumstance is unique but it seems to go like this more than not.
        You seem a little hung up on the downsides of adopting a first nations kid even though at no time was it suggested that someone was going to adopt a first nations kid.

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        • #79
          Originally posted by Clambake View Post
          My wife gave birth at 39 and we were given a 1 in 76 chance of downs at 12 weeks. The doctor suggested abortion.

          We went and saw a second doctor and told us , so what. All it's means is there is 98 percent chance your baby doesn't have downs.

          You up have to take those stats kind of glass half full imho.
          Interesting. Was your doctor named Morgentaler?

          We had our daughter when my wife was 37 and there was no mention of abortion other than if there are ever any complications that threaten the mother's life then they will always choose to save the mother's life.

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          • #80
            Originally posted by pappcam View Post

            You seem a little hung up on the downsides of adopting a first nations kid even though at no time was it suggested that someone was going to adopt a first nations kid.
            I didn't read it that way. Rather, just sharing his thoughts based on life experience.
            I think we're still allowed to do that here.

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            • #81
              Originally posted by pappcam View Post

              Interesting. Was your doctor named Morgentaler?

              We had our daughter when my wife was 37 and there was no mention of abortion other than if there are ever any complications that threaten the mother's life then they will always choose to save the mother's life.
              This is purely a joke and I'm glad it worked out for you but your Wife already accepted great risk having a young pappcam!!!! My Wife says my history is why she chose not to have kids, fear of history repeating!!!

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              • #82
                Originally posted by Poppy View Post

                I didn't read it that way. Rather, just sharing his thoughts based on life experience.
                I think we're still allowed to do that here.
                I was also referring to his 2 or 3 other posts in this thread about ending up with a FASD first nations kid.

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                • #83
                  Originally posted by Bates View Post

                  This is purely a joke and I'm glad it worked out for you but your Wife already accepted great risk having a young pappcam!!!! My Wife says my history is why she chose not to have kids, fear of history repeating!!!
                  I'm pretty sure she's hoping the daughter takes after her mother. Lol.

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                  • #84
                    Originally posted by pappcam View Post

                    You seem a little hung up on the downsides of adopting a first nations kid even though at no time was it suggested that someone was going to adopt a first nations kid.
                    The post was actually a reply to big Norm and his international adoption and why he avoided trying to adopt from the local children in need.

                    Are you going to give me a lecture
                    about wanting an aryan super designer baby next?

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                    • #85
                      Originally posted by Clambake View Post

                      The post was actually a reply to big Norm and his international adoption and why he avoided trying to adopt from the local children in need.
                      In all honesty we would have done domestic first however its such a long process and there is no guarantee you will get a child (or you can be matched and then have them returned to the birth family). If you are of first nations decent its a fast track because they want to keep the culture etc. We could have waited 10 years before we were matched domestically with no guarantees.

                      We might look at domestic adoption if we decide we want another, or even become foster parents to children in care, my wife just went back to work from her mat leave so maybe look at that in the next year or two.

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